The quick update

Because I said I was going to be accountable, but I am finding I have less and less time for myself, here is the quickest update: Down 1.5 lbs (should be a little more, but got slightly side-tracked). Doing really well this last week and going in for blood work next week to see if my cholesterol has gone down (I'm not quite in the range I should be).

I'm also finally FINALLY back into a good running groove. I'm only running 20 mpw but hey, it's been 20 mpw for 3 weeks now with TWO group workouts (one track and one tempo-ish). After 1.5 months of solid running, I'm finally feeling like myself and getting the slightest bit of speed back.

Unfortunately, no cycling as it takes too much time and there is a wedding to plan!

Something is working

I haven't been posting regularly but am surprisingly doing very well. So well that I'm getting nervous.

After a big holiday weekend filled with social events and two nights of bingeing, I decided on June 1st I was going to kick this awful habit once and for all. That's my #1 goal for the month of June.

It's June 7th and I'm 7 days into being binge-free. I haven't made it past 10 days in a very, VERY long time.

I am still working through the Beck book, but am taking it at a much slower pace. Sometimes I don't have the time to read the next day's assignment and I also want to feel that I've mastered the concepts of the current day before moving on. I am probably at day 13. But a very successful Day 13. I am reading my ARC 2x/day, giving myself credit, and trying to talk back to those negative thoughts as much as possible. I am working on mastering distinguishing between the desire to eat and truly being hungry and using the behavioral techniques to combat cravings.

I think it's working.

On track

I had a slight slip up on Sunday and Monday night but I didn't let it derail me and I'm back on track. I felt bloated and "off" today from the high intake of salt.

Still doing Beck, although I haven't been detailing the steps here. I've been through these initial steps before so I didn't want to repeat my thoughts. I'll probably start soon though, just as a form of reinforcement.

The coach sent out an interesting email yesterday and then reiterated some of the points today after the workout. It was essentially about how (triathletes) look for answers in the wrong places. They look for external things that they can change easily: a different coach, different bike fit, lighter bike, new gadgets ... but those things are only 10% or less of the equation. It's what we do everyday that really counts. It's putting in the quality workouts, eating a proper diet, getting enough sleep and keeping our stress levels down. That's what will really produce results.

His talk resonated with me because I know I've been there before. I neglect the daily things (especially sleep!) and think about how getting a new bike will make me faster. But I really need to put the time into myself first.

Stay the course

I'm doing "okay" but things could be better. While I haven't binged (hurray!) and am "mostly" sticking to the plan, I've been allowing myself little "cheats" here and there. A few jelly beans, a couple of chocolate-covered raisins, some multi-grain chips -- you get the picture.

I did go the the track workout this morning, which is the first one I've been to this month. It was painful. Then again, when is track NOT painful? As D passed me on the run, I mumbled to her, "D, I hate Coach." She laughed and replied, "KJ, I've hated him for YEARS!"

There is nothing like a painful workout to make you swear you won't ever eat any junk food again. I kept thinking there was no way I was going to ruin all this hard work (and pain and suffering) with crap food! Unfortunately, several hours later during the after lunch coma, I had a few of the above-mentioned chocolate-covered raisins.

I think I need to start logging food again for accountability. Boring and tedious -- but it works.

Not a good start to April

The first part of this month have been hectic with travel and a lot of events going on. Not that those are excuses, but my eating hasn't been as good as I would have liked it. To make things worse, after having finished the race, I haven't been training hard at all and have been taking it easy. I can't remember a weekend that I didn't do at least SOME form of exercise and that describes my entire weekend!

But I'm finally back into the swing of things this week... eating vegetables again and getting back to a normal routine. I didn't weigh on Monday for fear that it would discourage me, but I'll weigh again next Monday.

Day 34 / 42

I don't know how to express how disappointed and frustrated I am and I really don't want to be a downer so I'll say very little tonight. Just a brief food log... I "cheated" today and had an orange as a snack.

B - green smoothie: 8 oz bok choy, 1 T flax seed, 1 oranges, 1 pear

L - salad: romaine, cabbage, 1/2 small avocado, 1/2 red bell pepper, 13 baby carrots, 1/2 cup garbanzo beans, casinera's caesar dressing + 1 clementine

S - 1 tart orange

D - big pot of spinach-cabbage-broccoli tomato soup

E - run: 1:00, weights: 0:30, swim: 0:50